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answer_keyby kexing
Remembrance Part 5
The door returns them to the office. The pleasant man is sitting behind the desk again looking at them with the same fixed smile but something in the air tells Akira that he is much less amused.
“Well,” the man says. “I must admit, this is a huge disappointment.”
Shindou grabs Akira’s shoulder so hard it hurts and they both stand very still. Like the last time, the office is caught up in absolute silence, and Akira is sure both his and Shindou’s heartbeats are clearly audible.
“Oh, well, what can one do? The rules must certainly be abided. You have staked your claim Touya-san. But we will miss the taste of your despair Shindou-san”
Shindou-san now, not Shindou Hikaru and that subtle change is enough to ease some of the tension in Akira’s shoulders.
”Well, if I may see your hands, I’ll confirm the transaction.”
He sees the looks on their faces and adds very pleasantly,
“Oh, no need to worry. We did lose this case, and it cannot be contested. This is just a formality. Part of the paperwork, if you will.”
The only reason that Akira stretches his hand out is that he still has the knowledge in the back of his mind that says this man doesn’t lie. Shindou must feel it too, because he holds out his hand at the same time.
The man touches their palms with his fingertips, and for a brief moment Akira can see a red thread connecting him and Shindou flair up. It starts out frayed, filling up with color and thickening before it fades out of sight again, but Akira is almost certain he can still feel it, a slight tug between them. For the first time since he woke up on that Friday morning, the pressing unease disappears from his chest and the world clicks back into place.
“Touya-san, Shindou-san, you are free to take your leave. If you find anyone in need of any assistance from Hell, please recommend us. We are a very small Hell, and extra business is always welcome. Have a delightful life, and please remember our services.”
And then the world tilts again. In a blink they are suddenly back in the real world, in Shindou’s apartment for some reason, still pressed up against each other and tensed for a fight. They are both absolutely quiet for a moment. The sun is shining, and they can hear faint bustle of people on the street outside. Akira opens his mouth, closes it. Tries again.
“What day is it?”
Shindou’s hands shake a bit as he lets Akira's shoulder go. He makes his way to the TV, turns it on, and the sound of the morning news fills the room. It’s May 5th, 8 am - exactly the time when Akira was on his way out the door. No time has passed, no one has missed them and Akira still has a student in forty-five minutes.
They are quiet again. There are probably about five million things they should be asking each other right now, but when Shindou opens his mouth it is with a request.
“Touya,” he says, almost desperately. “Please play a game with me.”
Akira doesn't have time for a game. He has two students and an interview scheduled for this morning alone, and a Chinese class and a game in the afternoon. He has never skipped out on any responsibilities in his life.
But now, standing here in Shindou’s apartment with Shindou’s eyes on him, he wants that game more than he has ever wanted anything. He needs it like air and he can feel his heart squeeze at the thought of it. The image of the go board devoid of any answers is still fresh in his memory, as is the feeling of losing himself to that cold darkness.
“Yeah,” he breathes out, mouth dry. “Let’s play right now.”
He does have the forethought to actually call in sick. There is no denying that he is creating trouble for a great deal of people right now and Akira should be horrified with himself, but he’s not. All he can think about is Shindou and Shindou’s go and the tug of the red thread between them.
They don’t stop at one game. The firsts couple of games are basically speed go, just the fast succession of stones on the board; the fourth is slower, and by the fifth Shindou is yelling at him in righteous indignation again. Akira is so happy to hear Shindou’s yelling that he is close to actually giving him a hug, until he is side-tracked by something utterly moronic Shindou says and starts yelling too. It is dark when they finally stop, and Akira is pretty sure his phone has been buzzing a dozen times. He realizes that there probably are a lot of people wondering where he is right now, and he is going to answer, he is, but right now he and Shindou are lying on the floor next to each other and are simply breathing in sync. The silence is very comfortable, but Akira is the first to break it. Because even if he figured out the basics, there is still a story he wants to hear from Shindou himself.
“So, you want to tell me about Sai?”
Shindou stiffens for a second and his hands clench into fists, but he relaxes almost immediately, and laughs under his breath.
“Yeah, I suppose that story isn’t that unbelievable anymore, huh?”
Akira simply raises his eyebrows at him. He feels he is getting pretty used to unbelievable.
“When I was twelve, I was in my grandfathers shed with Akari, looking for something to sell…”
Turns out that Shindou really wasn’t exaggerating when he talked about unbelievable, and that is despite the fact that Akira has figured out the part about the haunted go board. If Akira hadn’t just spent a week in hell, one that apparently wasn’t even a minute in the real world, chances are he would have thrown something at Shindou and gone home. Now he listens silently, caught somewhere between fascination and resignation. Of course Sai was a 1000-year-old ghost that lived in a go board. Of course he once possessed Shuusaku, played all his games and returned through a twelve-year-old boy that never touched a go stone in his life. Naturally, all because he desired to reach the Hand of God. What was Akira expecting, really? If you wanted to stick around Shindou, these obviously were things you had to grow used to. But when Shindou’s story reaches the – spectacularly misfired – attempt to bring Sai back and doors to other dimensions, he can’t possibly keep quiet anymore.
“But what were you thinking?! Are you insane? You had to have understood how dangerous that was?!”
Shindou’s eyes have been suspiciously wet during the story and now he turns his face away, but Akira can hear his voice shaking.
“I just. I just wanted him back. I mean,” - deep breath -“I mean, everyone wanted to see him. Your dad wanted to, and you and…” Akira can hear Shindou swallow. “And I missed him. I really, really wanted to meet him again, and when I found that book I thought-” He laughs self-consciously and rubs his eyes. “You would have really liked him, you know. I wish you could actually have talked to him.”
Akira swallows too, feeling inadequate. He is good at being polite, and over the years Shindou has made him really adept at pissed off, but he feels helpless when it comes to comforting people. He wants to know what to say so badly, but the words seem to get stuck in his throat.
“I’m sorry,” is the only thing he gets out. “I wish I could have talked to him, too.”
Shindou smiles at him, still a bit red-eyed.
“Yeah.”
They are silent for a few minutes and Akira takes some more time to think about the fact that Shindou was sort of possessed by a 1000-year-old ghost. It isn’t as hard to wrap his head around as it probably should be.
Shindou shifts.
“So now you know, huh? I mean, now you don’t have to bug me about it anymore.”
“I wouldn’t have bugged you about it if you hadn’t played impossible go,” Akira points out, miffed. “How the hell was I supposed to know that you played on behalf of a 1000-year-old go genius half the time?”
Shindou grins.
“Well, how was I supposed to know you were some tiny go prodigy? You looked like a normal kid. Just, you know, with stupid hair.”
Then, totally bypassing Akira’s outrage, he adds,
“And technically, that wasn’t any of your business, was it?”
“Not any of my business?!”
Yes, the Shindou who makes him want to break things is well and truly back.
“You asshole! You’re my go rival, I am damn well entitled to know everything about your go.” Then, suddenly remembering where he has been for a week, he adds,
“And your go is mine. Even HELL says so.”
But Shindou switches from amused to serious so fast that Akira almost gets whiplash.
“But am I still? Your rival, I mean?”
Akira can only stare at him in response, because after all they have been through the past few days, this has to be the dumbest question anyone has ever asked him. Shindou sees his face, fidgets in discomfort and tries to explain.
“I never played those games. The first ones, I mean. That was Sai.”
He stops and then quietly adds,
“It was never me you were looking for.”
Akira carefully considers what to say, but in truth, there is only one answer to that, no matter how melodramatic it might sound.
“I don’t know why Sai stayed on this earth,” he says slowly. “I don’t know what his purpose was or if he achieved it. But if there is one thing that I believe, it is that we were put in this world to play each other.”
There is no doubt that it sound terribly presumptuous and grand, and Akira fully expects Shindou to laugh at him, but that doesn’t make it less true and it had to be said.
But Shindou doesn’t laugh. He breathes out, “Touya.”
And when Akira turns his head and looks at him, Shindou has an expression on his face that Akira has never seen before. His chest heats up and he can feel his heart pounding. Suddenly he can’t look at Shindou anymore, so he closes his eyes, but he can hear Shindou move and then he feels a soft pressure on his lips. Shindou is kissing me.
You should probably panic, a part of his mind tells him. You should get up, answer your phone and put an end to this. After all, he has been trying to ignore these feelings for years, but right now he can't for the life of him remember why. The fact is that Akira doesn’t want to put an end to this. He doesn’t care what he should be doing. He pulls Shindou down instead and opens his mouth to Shindou’s tongue, allowing the kiss to grow deeper. Then he uses his bodyweight to flip them, because Shindou should never get anything exactly his own way. He can feel Shindou laugh into his mouth. Akira’s whole body feels like it’s melting, and the heat is almost painful but he relishes it; the total opposite from the cold that has been crowding him for days. He doesn’t answer his phone for a very long time.
kexingRemembrance Part 5
The door returns them to the office. The pleasant man is sitting behind the desk again looking at them with the same fixed smile but something in the air tells Akira that he is much less amused.
“Well,” the man says. “I must admit, this is a huge disappointment.”
Shindou grabs Akira’s shoulder so hard it hurts and they both stand very still. Like the last time, the office is caught up in absolute silence, and Akira is sure both his and Shindou’s heartbeats are clearly audible.
“Oh, well, what can one do? The rules must certainly be abided. You have staked your claim Touya-san. But we will miss the taste of your despair Shindou-san”
Shindou-san now, not Shindou Hikaru and that subtle change is enough to ease some of the tension in Akira’s shoulders.
”Well, if I may see your hands, I’ll confirm the transaction.”
He sees the looks on their faces and adds very pleasantly,
“Oh, no need to worry. We did lose this case, and it cannot be contested. This is just a formality. Part of the paperwork, if you will.”
The only reason that Akira stretches his hand out is that he still has the knowledge in the back of his mind that says this man doesn’t lie. Shindou must feel it too, because he holds out his hand at the same time.
The man touches their palms with his fingertips, and for a brief moment Akira can see a red thread connecting him and Shindou flair up. It starts out frayed, filling up with color and thickening before it fades out of sight again, but Akira is almost certain he can still feel it, a slight tug between them. For the first time since he woke up on that Friday morning, the pressing unease disappears from his chest and the world clicks back into place.
“Touya-san, Shindou-san, you are free to take your leave. If you find anyone in need of any assistance from Hell, please recommend us. We are a very small Hell, and extra business is always welcome. Have a delightful life, and please remember our services.”
And then the world tilts again. In a blink they are suddenly back in the real world, in Shindou’s apartment for some reason, still pressed up against each other and tensed for a fight. They are both absolutely quiet for a moment. The sun is shining, and they can hear faint bustle of people on the street outside. Akira opens his mouth, closes it. Tries again.
“What day is it?”
Shindou’s hands shake a bit as he lets Akira's shoulder go. He makes his way to the TV, turns it on, and the sound of the morning news fills the room. It’s May 5th, 8 am - exactly the time when Akira was on his way out the door. No time has passed, no one has missed them and Akira still has a student in forty-five minutes.
They are quiet again. There are probably about five million things they should be asking each other right now, but when Shindou opens his mouth it is with a request.
“Touya,” he says, almost desperately. “Please play a game with me.”
Akira doesn't have time for a game. He has two students and an interview scheduled for this morning alone, and a Chinese class and a game in the afternoon. He has never skipped out on any responsibilities in his life.
But now, standing here in Shindou’s apartment with Shindou’s eyes on him, he wants that game more than he has ever wanted anything. He needs it like air and he can feel his heart squeeze at the thought of it. The image of the go board devoid of any answers is still fresh in his memory, as is the feeling of losing himself to that cold darkness.
“Yeah,” he breathes out, mouth dry. “Let’s play right now.”
He does have the forethought to actually call in sick. There is no denying that he is creating trouble for a great deal of people right now and Akira should be horrified with himself, but he’s not. All he can think about is Shindou and Shindou’s go and the tug of the red thread between them.
They don’t stop at one game. The firsts couple of games are basically speed go, just the fast succession of stones on the board; the fourth is slower, and by the fifth Shindou is yelling at him in righteous indignation again. Akira is so happy to hear Shindou’s yelling that he is close to actually giving him a hug, until he is side-tracked by something utterly moronic Shindou says and starts yelling too. It is dark when they finally stop, and Akira is pretty sure his phone has been buzzing a dozen times. He realizes that there probably are a lot of people wondering where he is right now, and he is going to answer, he is, but right now he and Shindou are lying on the floor next to each other and are simply breathing in sync. The silence is very comfortable, but Akira is the first to break it. Because even if he figured out the basics, there is still a story he wants to hear from Shindou himself.
“So, you want to tell me about Sai?”
Shindou stiffens for a second and his hands clench into fists, but he relaxes almost immediately, and laughs under his breath.
“Yeah, I suppose that story isn’t that unbelievable anymore, huh?”
Akira simply raises his eyebrows at him. He feels he is getting pretty used to unbelievable.
“When I was twelve, I was in my grandfathers shed with Akari, looking for something to sell…”
Turns out that Shindou really wasn’t exaggerating when he talked about unbelievable, and that is despite the fact that Akira has figured out the part about the haunted go board. If Akira hadn’t just spent a week in hell, one that apparently wasn’t even a minute in the real world, chances are he would have thrown something at Shindou and gone home. Now he listens silently, caught somewhere between fascination and resignation. Of course Sai was a 1000-year-old ghost that lived in a go board. Of course he once possessed Shuusaku, played all his games and returned through a twelve-year-old boy that never touched a go stone in his life. Naturally, all because he desired to reach the Hand of God. What was Akira expecting, really? If you wanted to stick around Shindou, these obviously were things you had to grow used to. But when Shindou’s story reaches the – spectacularly misfired – attempt to bring Sai back and doors to other dimensions, he can’t possibly keep quiet anymore.
“But what were you thinking?! Are you insane? You had to have understood how dangerous that was?!”
Shindou’s eyes have been suspiciously wet during the story and now he turns his face away, but Akira can hear his voice shaking.
“I just. I just wanted him back. I mean,” - deep breath -“I mean, everyone wanted to see him. Your dad wanted to, and you and…” Akira can hear Shindou swallow. “And I missed him. I really, really wanted to meet him again, and when I found that book I thought-” He laughs self-consciously and rubs his eyes. “You would have really liked him, you know. I wish you could actually have talked to him.”
Akira swallows too, feeling inadequate. He is good at being polite, and over the years Shindou has made him really adept at pissed off, but he feels helpless when it comes to comforting people. He wants to know what to say so badly, but the words seem to get stuck in his throat.
“I’m sorry,” is the only thing he gets out. “I wish I could have talked to him, too.”
Shindou smiles at him, still a bit red-eyed.
“Yeah.”
They are silent for a few minutes and Akira takes some more time to think about the fact that Shindou was sort of possessed by a 1000-year-old ghost. It isn’t as hard to wrap his head around as it probably should be.
Shindou shifts.
“So now you know, huh? I mean, now you don’t have to bug me about it anymore.”
“I wouldn’t have bugged you about it if you hadn’t played impossible go,” Akira points out, miffed. “How the hell was I supposed to know that you played on behalf of a 1000-year-old go genius half the time?”
Shindou grins.
“Well, how was I supposed to know you were some tiny go prodigy? You looked like a normal kid. Just, you know, with stupid hair.”
Then, totally bypassing Akira’s outrage, he adds,
“And technically, that wasn’t any of your business, was it?”
“Not any of my business?!”
Yes, the Shindou who makes him want to break things is well and truly back.
“You asshole! You’re my go rival, I am damn well entitled to know everything about your go.” Then, suddenly remembering where he has been for a week, he adds,
“And your go is mine. Even HELL says so.”
But Shindou switches from amused to serious so fast that Akira almost gets whiplash.
“But am I still? Your rival, I mean?”
Akira can only stare at him in response, because after all they have been through the past few days, this has to be the dumbest question anyone has ever asked him. Shindou sees his face, fidgets in discomfort and tries to explain.
“I never played those games. The first ones, I mean. That was Sai.”
He stops and then quietly adds,
“It was never me you were looking for.”
Akira carefully considers what to say, but in truth, there is only one answer to that, no matter how melodramatic it might sound.
“I don’t know why Sai stayed on this earth,” he says slowly. “I don’t know what his purpose was or if he achieved it. But if there is one thing that I believe, it is that we were put in this world to play each other.”
There is no doubt that it sound terribly presumptuous and grand, and Akira fully expects Shindou to laugh at him, but that doesn’t make it less true and it had to be said.
But Shindou doesn’t laugh. He breathes out, “Touya.”
And when Akira turns his head and looks at him, Shindou has an expression on his face that Akira has never seen before. His chest heats up and he can feel his heart pounding. Suddenly he can’t look at Shindou anymore, so he closes his eyes, but he can hear Shindou move and then he feels a soft pressure on his lips. Shindou is kissing me.
You should probably panic, a part of his mind tells him. You should get up, answer your phone and put an end to this. After all, he has been trying to ignore these feelings for years, but right now he can't for the life of him remember why. The fact is that Akira doesn’t want to put an end to this. He doesn’t care what he should be doing. He pulls Shindou down instead and opens his mouth to Shindou’s tongue, allowing the kiss to grow deeper. Then he uses his bodyweight to flip them, because Shindou should never get anything exactly his own way. He can feel Shindou laugh into his mouth. Akira’s whole body feels like it’s melting, and the heat is almost painful but he relishes it; the total opposite from the cold that has been crowding him for days. He doesn’t answer his phone for a very long time.
no subject
Date: 2013-09-20 06:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 11:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-22 06:08 am (UTC)- Mahidol
no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 12:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-23 01:24 am (UTC)It is stuck on pleasant, like someone painted his face on with permanent colors. Without knowing why Akira suddenly gets the horrifying suspicion that someone actually has.
---> This is the first line, besides the killer opening, that really got to me. It is very creepy!
Despite his well-mannered image Akira isn't a very patient person. Shindou is the one who waits and lays traps, Akira prefers to line up his pieces and go to war.
---> LOVE. This is so very them, and so well put.
My favorite part overall is the little grade school fight where Akira says he'll wait outside the shop if he has to. That's such a crazy thing to say, but it is so very Akira-- Akira really is kind of a weirdo, isn't it? It just felt like something I might have read straight from the manga.
I also really like the little detail about the red thread between their fingers. Very sweet.
Wow, I'm gushing, sorry!
[Auerbach]
no subject
Date: 2013-09-23 01:28 am (UTC)And the empty Shindo...
I don't even know what to say except there was nothing here that I didn't enjoy. Seriously.
Okay I really am done.
[Auerbach again]
no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 12:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-24 02:29 pm (UTC)Katju
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Date: 2013-10-18 12:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-26 12:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 12:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-28 04:51 am (UTC)--Alberti
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Date: 2013-10-18 12:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-30 01:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-18 12:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-23 04:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-10-29 11:24 am (UTC)